Navigating Parenting Under Pressure: Insights from ADHDKC

Parenting is hard. Parenting neurodivergent kids can feel even harder. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, stretched thin, or like you’re constantly juggling too many responsibilities — you’re in good company.

Understanding Parental Stress

This month’s ADHDKC Parent Group talk took place both at the J and online. It was our first hybrid meeting in quite a while, and of course, the classic tech gremlins made an appearance. The projector wouldn’t share anything but a full screen, and the camera refused to cooperate… you know how it goes. Thankfully, Dr. Stuppy had recorded a full run-through earlier in the day, so we’re able to share a clean, uninterrupted version with you.

The session dives into something many parents experience but rarely name out loud: parental stress and caregiver wellbeing. In this talk, pediatrician Dr. Kristen Stuppy unpacks why parenting today feels so heavy, how chronic stress affects our bodies and minds, and — most importantly — practical ways to lighten the load without adding more pressure to your life.

Key Takeaways from the Talk

You’ll learn:

• Why parents today report higher stress levels than other adults

• How chronic stress affects sleep, focus, digestion, and emotional regulation

• What’s actually happening in your brain and nervous system during stress

• Simple, realistic strategies to support your mental and physical health

• Why progress, not perfection, is the goal

  
  

This conversation blends science, lived experience, and compassionate strategies that parents can actually use in real life. Feeling overwhelmed does not mean you’re failing as a parent. It means you’re carrying a lot. Parents under pressure.

Small Changes, Big Impact

Small changes like better sleep habits, realistic boundaries, movement, and connection with others can gradually help your nervous system reset and make daily life feel more manageable. You don’t have to fix everything at once. One small step forward is enough.

Watch or Listen — Your Choice

The full YouTube channel and is embedded in this week’s Substack post. If you’d rather listen on the go, the audio version is also available on your favorite podcast player, making it easy to learn while commuting, walking, or doing chores. We’ve added ADHD KC Conversations to Apple podcast and Overcast.

Resources from Parents Under Pressure

• AAP Family Media Plan

• Mayo Clinic’s CBT-I

• Mind Tricks (mindfulness)

• Quest for Health KC - Dr Stuppy’s Substack

• Surgeon General’s Advisory

  
  

And if you know another parent who could use a reminder that they’re not alone in this, please share this talk with them. Share

Chapters

00:00 — Introduction to Parental Stress and Wellbeing

05:32 — Understanding the Prevalence of Parental Stress

10:12 — The Impact of Chronic Stress on Health

22:05 — Recognizing Stress as a Signal for Self-Care

23:19 — Practical Strategies for Managing Stress

37:13 — Embracing Progress and Community Support

Transcript Highlights

Auto-generated. Excuse the errors.

Welcome to Parents Under Pressure, strengthening your mental health and wellbeing as a caregiver. Tonight, we’re talking about things most of us know, but don’t always recognize the full impact of, and that awareness can help us make more meaningful choices.

Before we dive in, take a moment, close your eyes if you’d like, and just notice your body. Are your shoulders tight? Is your jaw clenched? Is your mind already running through a million things you need to do tonight after this talk? If so, you’re in the right place. Many of you are carrying a lot, not just because you’re doing anything wrong, but because what you’re navigating is genuinely hard.

If you feel tired, overwhelmed, or stretched thin, nothing is wrong with you. You’re not failing. You’re just responding to a role in a world that has a lot of us. And tonight isn’t about you trying harder. It’s about understanding why parenting can feel so heavy and what actually helps lighten the load.

By the end of tonight, you’ll learn the prevalence of parental stress, understanding the impact of stress on physical health. This part’s a little heavy, but stick with me because you’ll leave with at least one way to better manage your stress.

The Reality of Parenting Stress

In August of 2024, Vivek Murthy, the Surgeon General of the time, felt this was an important enough problem that he released an advisory on the mental health and wellbeing of parents. Tonight is about understanding why that is and what can be realistically done about it.

Recent data shows that parents consistently report higher stress levels than other adults. So if you’re comfortable, raise your hand if you ever felt like you have too much on your plate. Who feels like everyone else seems to have things together better than you? It’s not surprising. A lot of us tend to hide it well, and so do others.

Stress shows up differently at every stage of parenting. In the early years, it’s sleep deprivation and adjusting to new roles. As kids grow, the challenges shift, managing their emotions, school pressure, social dynamics, and constant decision-making. By adolescence, parents juggle the increasing independence of their children, risk-taking behaviors, and worries about their kids’ well-being—all while managing work and daily life.

The mental load is really heavy. Keeping track of schedules, needs, emotions, and responsibilities takes real cognitive energy. Over time, that constant demand can affect our focus, memory, and overall well-being.

The Impact of Chronic Stress

The data backs this up. 33% of parents reported high levels of stress compared to 20% of other adults, and nearly half of parents said that they were overwhelmed most days of the week. So for those of you who might be feeling this way, you’re definitely not alone.

I want you to take a moment and reflect. What’s one word that describes how parenting has felt for you this week? Just think it in your head. Naming feelings is the first step towards control. Name it to tame it. It helps manage overwhelm, improves emotional regulation, and creates space between feeling and reacting to it.

The important thing to remember is this: you’re not alone in feeling this way. While this level of stress is common, it doesn’t mean you have to carry it without support. It’s important not to carry guilt or the feeling that you should be doing something better. When these thoughts show up, notice them. They’re a normal response to pressure, not a personal failure.

Navigating the Challenges Together

Parents today face stressors that previous generations didn’t. The isolation, loneliness, social media, and constant achievement pressure can feel overwhelming. You’re not less capable; the expectations just keep stacking up. National data shows this affects many families.

Mental health challenges also hit some parents harder. Experiences like community violence, poverty, racism, discrimination, health issues, and family structure all shape how stress shows up. We all respond differently. That’s part of being human.

As parents, we wear many hats. Each role comes with its own set of challenges. Juggling these roles can lead to stress and burnout. There are not enough hours in the day, so parents often sacrifice personal time needed for self-care.

Finding Balance in Everyday Life

So how can we find balance? Here are some practical strategies to consider:

1. Set Limits: Identify what’s essential and cut back on non-essential obligations. Learn to say no without guilt.

2. Exercise Regularly: Find activities that fit your busy schedule. Play with your kids or take short walks during the day.

3. Nutrition Matters: Meal prep with friends or family to make healthy eating easier.

4. Prioritize Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep each night. Limit caffeine and screen time before bed.

5. Practice Mindfulness: Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine to help manage stress.

   
   

These strategies can help you navigate the challenges of parenting. Remember, you don’t need to fix everything at once. Even small moments of awareness, rest, or self-compassion can make a real difference over time.

Conclusion: Embracing Progress

As you leave tonight, I hope you can carry one simple message with you: your body and mind are doing their best. With a little understanding and support, you can find more balance.

Take one small step this week towards better health. Write down a commitment on a Post-It note and keep it visible. Remember, progress is quiet and gradual, and that’s okay. You will get there with those small steps.

Thank you for showing up for yourself and for the people you care about. I hope you leave feeling a little lighter and more informed. Let’s support each other on this journey.

What are your questions?